Pieces of a Broken Heart Read online

  © 2019 Jake Houston. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  ISBN 978-1-54399-197-0 eBook 978-1-54399-198-7

  Dedicated to anyone who is dealing with or has had to deal with an emotional breakup.

  About the book:

  This book will illustrate the different ups and downs your mind goes through after a breakup. From the depressed state your mind hits about how hurt you feel and wanting to give up on love and the feelings of being unlovable that come with it; about trying to cling to the happy moments that started it all; looking for ways things might have been different. What you could have done; then back again to having no hope on moving forward.

  You will see the different stages as you read on. Back and forth, similar to how you would feel if you were going through it day by day. Most of the emotions that come from this are from personal experiences of past relationships I have been in. Not all of them ended poorly. In fact, I’m friends with a lot of my exes (not that I have a ton, but you get what I mean). Not all of them but some. Just because things don’t go as planned doesn’t mean that they are a bad person (although, some totally are) life is too short to hold a grudge and hang onto that negativity. In the end it’s only going to bring you down in the process.

  In the LGBTQ community, negativity can be all too common. Sadly, it’s become easy to just download an app and move on to the next guy without really having to process anything or deal with the emotional side of a breakup. After a while, it starts a Cannibalism effect where everyone tears one another down. This can often lead to someone in the relationship feeling as if they were “lesser” and not really receiving the love they were giving out. The truth is that everyone deals with pain differently. We might not agree with how others process it or how they went about moving on. That’s just the way things go sometimes. Don’t focus on how they are dealing and focus on you. After all, at the end of the day, you are the only one dealing with your emotions. Take care of yourself. Know you are loved!

  Happy reading

  -JH

  Contents

  Memories of Yesterday

  The Space Between

  Home Alone

  Ex-Friends

  Time

  Fighting

  Warrior

  Tin Man

  Release Me

  Broken

  The Crash

  New Love

  The Start of Love

  Picture Perfect

  Traveling Love

  In A World of Sounds

  Don’t Call Me Yours

  Rent Free

  Legs Don’t Fail Me Now

  A Reason

  Past Days

  Lightning

  Angel of Death

  Eyes

  Relationship

  The Beginning

  Picture

  Fiction

  Change

  Fairytale Ending

  Song

  Air

  Opened Book

  A New Hurt

  Silence

  Words from A Broken Heart

  Strength

  Hometown

  Sorry

  Years

  Walls

  Rubik’s Cube

  Wedding Day

  Knees

  Lies

  Manipulated Love

  First Love

  4th Of July

  The Whisper

  Love and War

  Future Love

  Gone

  Light

  Marriage

  City Lights

  Tragic Love

  Space Between

  Hangover

  Replaced

  Manipulated

  Growth

  The Boogieman

  History

  STOP

  Everything Reminds Me of You

  Crossing the Line

  I Do

  Dark Heart

  Fragrance

  Expectations

  Colorblind

  Alone

  Time

  A Lie

  Hearts Speak

  Not Welcome

  Shadows

  Without Wings

  The Antidote

  Mistakes

  I Miss You

  Photo

  The Storm

  Spanish Song

  Him

  Love

  Try

  Flaws and All

  Honey

  Sides

  Demon

  Today

  Dark Love

  Hurt

  A Note

  Truth

  Dan + Shay

  Feel Pain

  The Key

  Battle

  Potential

  A Reminder

  Love Languages

  I’m Sorry

  Fallen Angel

  Arachnophobia

  Afraid

  Mealtime

  Beautiful Lie

  Shadows of You

  Boomerang

  Memories of Yesterday

  Yesterday you were mine

  We had fun

  We had love

  We had all the time in the world

  But today is a new day

  Undoubtedly, you are someone new

  Who you were is no longer who you are

  A stranger in my bed

  I stay not because I love who you are

  But for who you were

  As time goes on

  I hope and I pray

  For another day with my memories of yesterday

  -JH

  The Space Between

  It’s been years now

  Some time has passed

  Every time I see you I try my best

  To act unbroken

  For nothing lasts

  All I ever wanted was to have you by my side

  Forever my ending, not my past

  -JH

  Home Alone

  Home alone, waiting for you

  He waits in silence

  Staring in the face of absence

  With a broken heart

  You’re all he has to hold onto

  With you gone he’s breaking dawn

  With new light all around

  No one else to hear the sounds of a broken heart

  Left lying on the ground

  -JH

  Sometimes before you can love another, you have to learn to love yourself. Become okay with the person you are. Nothing’s wrong with taking the time to show yourself the respect you deserve. It will help you teach others the correct way to love you.

  -JH

  Ex-Friends

  We started out as friends

  Then something more begins

  If I knew at the beginning the way things would end

  I wouldn’t change a thing

  For you gave me a friend

  Not for long

  Or even a while

  But as time goes on

  You still make me smile

  -JH

  Time

  If we turned back the clock, would you still choose me like I would you

  -JH

  Fighting

  I find myself fighting the urge to call and ask about his day

  I stay awake at night wondering if he is
sleeping alone

  I still reach out for his hand while driving

  Fighting the change that was always bound to happen is the hardest part of all

  -JH

  Warrior

  Fighting for the ability to move on

  Like a warrior

  I search for the strength deep within to keep going

  If I were to slow down now, it might just kill me

  I look forward to the days ahead after this inner battle is done

  When I’m no longer able to focus on thoughts of us

  Only then is the war truly over

  -JH

  Tin Man

  Life without a heart seems desolate

  But I promise you, Mr. Tin Man

  Living heartless isn’t so wrong

  No pain

  No hurt

  No one to leave your heart left full of sorrow

  Be thankful, Mr. Tin Man

  Your armor keeps you from falling apart

  For love is pain from the very start

  -JH

  Release Me

  From days apart

  To nights alone

  My mind finds you in the darkness

  I know you’re the poison in my apple

  Slowly killing what’s left of me

  I crave the hurt you gave

  When you’re not near it’s so bittersweet

  Please release my heart from your grasp

  -JH

  Broken

  I never understood the word until I met you

  -JH

  You have so much going for you. You are strong, passionate, and have more love in you than most people could ever hope for. I wish nothing but the best for you as you continue to bring out the best in yourself and those around you.

  -JH

  The Crash

  Our love was passionate from the start

  It was always meant to teach a lesson

  I thought I was ready

  Determined to stay strong

  But the train wreck was destined to happen

  But I wouldn’t let us crash

  I held on as long as you let me

  -JH

  New Love

  Like a Phoenix rising from the ashes, sometimes love will have to die in order to be reborn.

  -JH

  The Start of Love

  I’m shackled by the pains of my past

  Yet you open those chains so easily

  I tell you I’m not able to hold your heart

  While I’m still gathering the pieces of mine

  I’m worried I can’t love you until I can love myself

  You so effortlessly love me, imperfections and all

  Can you love them the way I want to love you?

  -JH

  Picture Perfect

  A photo is worth 1000 words

  So we always put our best image outward

  Every photo on Instagram with

  The perfect filter

  The perfect smile

  The perfect caption

  If only emotions had a filter

  Maybe then I could feel as perfect on the inside as I show on the outside

  But no amount of filters can fix a broken heart

  -JH

  Traveling Love

  With nowhere to go

  Feeling constantly on the run

  I invited you into my heart

  My soul

  To be my only one

  Now that some time has passed

  These shattered emotions still linger

  It seems I can’t push you away

  I always thought you would be my last

  -JH

  In A World of Sounds

  In a world where every sound can flow freely

  The shattered heart you left behind trumpets louder than any angel could

  Hard to speak

  Hard to hear

  Harder to feel

  A world silenced like a black and white film

  I stand here waiting for my world to be brought back into color

  With hope that one day this broken heart will once again be whole

  So I stay

  Waiting in a world you left deaf by your actions

  -JH

  Don’t Call Me Yours

  Don’t call me yours

  When you were never mine

  Talking to other guys and wasting my time

  While I was building us a home

  You thought it better to leave me all alone

  Now here I am with a crumbling heart

  Because you wanted nothing more than to tear it apart

  Less than a few years together

  Now wasted down the drain

  You did nothing other than to place the blame

  With distance and time to mend my heart

  I still hate you for taking mine from the very start

  <3

  -JH

  Rent Free

  You have been living in my mind so long I should start charging rent

  It’s unfair how easily you moved in and refuse to

  vacate

  With every passing day harder and harder to remove you from the premises

  Only viewing you as the new tenant of what was once mine

  -JH

  Legs Don’t Fail Me Now

  Running as fast as I can

  Going round and round

  Running to and from the hurt

  No end point in sight

  When will it stop

  Just wanting the dawn of a new day to break the chains that have been so heavily weighing me down

  Please legs

  Don’t fail me now

  So I start

  Running further than I ever have before

  For a new place can’t hurt me anymore

  Legs don’t fail me now

  -JH

  A Reason

  I knew you had pain in your heart

  But I loved you from the start

  Every part

  You are everything I didn’t know I needed

  Everything happens for a reason

  Let me be your reason to love again

  -JH

  Past Days

  I’m giving up

  I’ve gotta get away

  No use in thinking of past days

  You never cared about them anyway

  Why should I care now

  -JH

  Lightning

  You are the bolt of lightning that happened to strike twice

  -JH

  Angel of Death

  Once I thought I knew you

  I thought we had it all

  If our beginning told a story

  It would start with the fall

  The fall I had when we first met

  You would never let my heart forget

  You had it all from the start

  The angel of death took my heart

  -JH

  Eyes

  I always knew I loved you

  You seemed to have it all

  Your green eyes spoke to me without hesitation

  I knew that you would be the reason I considered love at all

  -JH

  Relationship

  Today is the day

  When two become one

  He said be mine

  My heart stops at the thought

  From here on out

  We tackle the world together

  Starting a new life with you by my side

  -JH

  The Beginning

  From across the room our eyes meet

  Lik
e a vampire pulling in his prey

  I’m compelled to walk over

  Hands sweating

  Heart racing

  Mouth getting dry

  Unsure of what to say

  You started the conversation

  One thing led to another

  The dawn of a new day

  -JH

  Picture

  Our picture is still in the frame

  On the wall in our empty house

  The last thing to move from the memory of us

  Holding on to what could have been

  It’s a shame you gave it all up for not loving yourself within

  -JH

  Fiction

  In the story of love he was the antagonist disguised as a protagonist

  -JH

  No one can take away your power unless you give it to them. Remember who you are and what you have to offer.

  You are a fucking bad ass and nothing can change that.

  Don’t let them.

  -JH

  Change

  If I knew then, what I know now…

  Would I change anything about us?

  -JH

  Fairytale Ending

  Their love isn’t like the movies

  With a fairytale ending

  Was he stupid for thinking it could be

  It was full of passion in the start

  How could they let it all fall apart

  He wished they could rewrite the script

  Flip this sunken ship

  So they could take this love on a round trip

  -JH

  Song

  You are the song that was never meant for me to hear

  -JH

  Air

  You were the fresh air in a city of smog